New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
