At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
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she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
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Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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