Only a mothe r could love this liver
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
