just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
