Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
