i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Randomize
