I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
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I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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