Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
My pussy is not your playground.
She even gives head with a lisp.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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