Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
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i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
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One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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