It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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