let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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