their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
