2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
