She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
