I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
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You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
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I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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