no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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