The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
