you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
