Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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