ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
