You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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