it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Randomize
