Already got asked if we're dating
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
