you traded sex for a burrito?
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
