Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more

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  (703): Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more http://tfl.nu/zuqw
  Replies (203) Good night (116779) Bad night (3274) Order T-Shirt
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.

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  (440): he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever. http://tfl.nu/ykgr
  Replies (64) Good night (9702) Bad night (927) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.

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  (301): so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first. http://tfl.nu/lqfv
  Replies (5) Good night (3067) Bad night (534)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.

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  (416): He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high. http://tfl.nu/zw5l
  Replies (31) Good night (7840) Bad night (1009) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.

  (1-214): View more from Texas

  ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...

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  (214): herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina. (1-214): ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname... http://tfl.nu/qpb9
  Replies (19) Good night (1721) Bad night (4682) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.

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  (732): people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself. http://tfl.nu/7r6x
  Replies (11) Good night (1195) Bad night (2744) Order T-Shirt
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?

  (1-906): View more from Michigan

  It's okay.

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  (906): Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay? (1-906): It's okay. http://tfl.nu/i6me
  Replies (9) Good night (1153) Bad night (3972) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..

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  (415): they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car.. http://tfl.nu/4cqo
  Replies (11) Good night (3183) Bad night (818)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.

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  (970): i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail. http://tfl.nu/p81z
  Replies (5) Good night (4555) Bad night (814) Order T-Shirt
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  (210): View more from Texas

  A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.

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  (210): A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day. http://tfl.nu/06c7
  Replies (5) Good night (2610) Bad night (615) Order T-Shirt
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?

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  (267): Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder? http://tfl.nu/3p5i
  Replies (4) Good night (2946) Bad night (672) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?

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  (203): Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight? http://tfl.nu/h4cr
  Replies (8) Good night (1432) Bad night (482) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.

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  (651): Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid. http://tfl.nu/33yz
  Replies (4) Good night (1210) Bad night (345) Order T-Shirt
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.

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  (541): One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse. http://tfl.nu/w6rf
  Replies (2) Good night (605) Bad night (314) Order T-Shirt
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.

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  (334): As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream. http://tfl.nu/b74h
  Replies (3) Good night (527) Bad night (141) Order T-Shirt

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