i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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