She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
