Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize