You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
