Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Panties = found
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
