i was rollin on her like bob the builder
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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