he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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