If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
You pole danced in your parka.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
