she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Randomize