So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
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I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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