hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Randomize
