Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize