either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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