if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
