oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
