So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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