i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize
