I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Randomize
