we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Im just a social blackout drinker.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
