Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
