I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
