I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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