is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
ttyl tear gas
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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