I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
