WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
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Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants