i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.